“BABY GIRL” – On Fathers.

I’m beginning to believe them.

When my two brothers conferenced me in on the topic of manly ethics.

When they discussed without dismembering, but forcefully dis-allowing
what type of men we welcomed in our TRIBE.
…I’m beginning to believe them.
Not to hype myself on PRIDE, I know we all get what we deserve… but they say those “guys”.. they’re are a different TYPE, and belong to a different WORLD.
And I’m … beginning to believe them.
When they say that a man who walks away from his obligations..
“Is just different than what we are, is just not from where we COME.
those type run into the darkness from the light of the SUN.”
“And..baby girl .. we… don’t want those here.”
“You shouldnt either.” They said..
“Do you think our ladies are perfect, you think that our wives don’t BITCH?”
“The difference is we stick it through,” they said… ‘”We make it work, we don’t scratch that carnal ITCH.”
“We FIGHT the SIGHT of sensuous WOMEN, comparing memories VISION to VISION like a movie screen.  The grand finale is gratitude from watching the pain of our child’s labor that we’ve been spared, and our wives were courageously GIVEN.
“We FIGHT the SIGHT of those young – in your face on south beach – perky breasts with the memory of watching our sleepless wives breastfeed our sons – and we appreciate the lil sag to em.  We now lose respect for the faces of layered on MAKEUP recalling the surprise of early morning, breakfast-in-bed WAKEUPS and we appreciate how those breasts match her tired eyes… that also have.. a lil sag to em.”
“The difference is we embrace our instinctual sense of purpose – in providing and PROTECTING, what we shared pleasure in PROCREATING.  Our penis is more than an appendage to our GROIN – it DICKtates where our lineage is GOING.  as long as we point it in the right DIRECTION.”
I’m beginning to believe them.
What most runner type of fathers don’t understand is that they morph the woman’s role when they pack and DISAPPEAR, creating exactly the type of bad bitch they FEAR.
When we have to provide and protect ALONE…

it can calcify our nurturing nature into STONE and builds muscles we didn’t even know that we could GROW. We get used to… fending for our cubs, and doing it ALONE.
Do not bother coming back brokenhearted, begging for forgiveness and GRACE – how bout you start handling your business and THEN ask for overstanding – till then, get the fuck out my FACE.
One time.. I might get it, this was all too scary for you to grasp and I might even take you back, in the hopes to rebuild someone more BRAVE – you know, try to show you that parenting is a learn as you go process.  It is as much for you – as for me – as for the child, a STAGE. I could understand a little stage FRIGHT, while you transition into letting go of the lime LIGHT..  but chalk up your tears to absence, someone might have already taken your PLACE.
While you’ve been slackin, you’ve only been decreasing in MASS, the story and illusion of a leader – a father – is merely a floating bubble made of holographic GAS – these false words follow you on your sexual follies, your bachelor CHARADE – creating more baby mamas out of girlfriends, if they only knew you had no intent to STAY.
How does a baby make you love this LESS? How or why do we deserve for you to abandon, what was beautiful before but today you call a MESS? I’ll tell you why.  Because you’re afraid to FAIL.  Because you’re frozen in indecision. Because you stand at the plank of adulthood and actually consider free falling into a sea of sharks – rather than turning around and facing fatherhood’s SUBMISSION. No one is telling you to be with me, I’m over that, but don’t use US as an excuse to abort your purpose.  FUCK “call of duty”, THIS is your MISSION.
I’m beginning to believe them – if only they had spoken up before I chose him, before I even thought to look his WAY.  A fool for a fool… but it’s the kids that get PLAYED.
Now any man has to come twice the times CORRECT. Only have half of me is LEFT – and honestly, I’m really fucking tired of being STRONG, my ankles are sore from the load that I’ve been carrying so LONG, and the sad part is – I think of you, and how many funny faces that you’re MISSING, the new song they come home from school SINGING, he knows how to use the phone now – but when he dials you, it just keeps… RINGING…
Let me, perhaps, use my poetic capabilities to help you UNDERSTAND – what happens when a woman becomes impregnated by a MAN; let me fill you on on the fact that we we ultimately become pregnant, because we allow our bodies to CONCEIVE, because we CAN.  At nine weeks NEW, a female fetus has a uterus and ovaries, we are born with all our eggs to make future YOU’S, – somewhere in our thoughts we authorize pregnancy as a CAPACITY, because we control our bodies just like what enters into our vaginal CAVITY.  Our intuition and intention communicates directly to our WOMB – we  you to procreate within us, what you think? You got us pregnant just because you wanted to, FOOL? We anticipate the life shift – before you notice the belly, we are fully aware it will be nine months SOON.  As you undergo hormonal SWOONS, the fear and the anxiety of PROCREATION, we can feel the life forming from our MIXATION – we can feel the DNA blending me and you WITHIN,  this triggers our instinct as commences to kick IN.  The little life  “two as one” BRIGHT and signals us to keep this bloodline TIGHT,  a man will never know what it feels like to harbor within … the product that UNITES.  Its because we feel arms and legs, fingers and toes being built from your blood cells and MINE because we feel the heart of a new life beating from our intimate TIME.  Its because we get to know this fetus as an energy long before it ever feels the heat of SUNSHINE.  You and I are it’s LIFELINE –  a father is more than cutting the umbilical cord.  When you walk away, you interrupt its fuckin LIFETIME.
Raising boys with no men and girls with no KING – we are born as princesses, but in subconscious search for HIM – we prematurely perceive ourselves as mateable QUEENS.  Figuring that the faster we grow up, the sooner we can fill up this sadness and NEED – only to end up, subconsciously selecting princes we deem kings who will do us just like YOU DID – come on now!!  Your same fear, pride and insecurity infiltrate any potential CONNECTION, because love has no example from which to be REFLECTING, and the cycle you commenced by leaving – leaves our children in perpetual DISCONNECTIONS.  I promise, no matter how bad of a dad you’d fear you’d be.. it would have been better if you stayed.  At this point, it’s just fear of failure – MANIFESTED.
I’m trying to my hardest – to perform right brain and left brain BALANCE, juggling the encompassment of male and female energy ACCESS, my kids are happy and healthy … so i give myself a modest “B”. But fuck… I’m tired, I’m exhausted, I told you before I had them – this is not how my kind BREEDS.  How much could you have possibly ever loved me – if this is where you force me to BE?
The next time your baby mama incessantly calls your PHONE, understand this is her instinct, her womb is telling her “call him, to come HOME.’  When your wife in her NIGHT’s sleep turns to her SIDE, communicate you got her BACK, wrap your arms around her hold her from BEHIND.
We are a body language inspired SPECIES, we are from that which we CAME – hence the saying, “Watch how he treats his mother, he will treat you the SAME”.
Baby girl… those men are a different type, we don’t want those here.  Because we have a kingdom to reign.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s